Monday, December 14, 2009
I'm just shit to you. You can say all the nice sweet little things you want, and I will continue to be deluded time and again, but at the end of the day, I'm still that damned piece of shit to you.
Like every other human being, you can selfish, self-centered, self-absorbed, and even if you aren't the above, I am never important enough, my words and actions are never enough, but yet I hold on to this, accelerating my fall into oblivion. Nobody is perfect, but I really do wish that someone would be imperfectly perfect for me, to make me feel like I'm not just some dispensable ornament to other people's lives. Because I know that is exactly what I am to everyone around me.
Would you even have the slightest idea how excruciatingly painful it is to be that odd, sore thumb sticking out? No you don't and no you won't.
I'm going crazy.
12/14/2009 09:53:00 PM
Sunday, November 29, 2009
I wish I could be a part of the vast skies, mingling with the clouds and staring at the stars late into the night. I wish I could soar high and leave everything behind, cease to exist in a physical form and allow my consciousness to float adrift for eternity. And by the time my fantasies ended, my legs were shaking, my body was icy cold, and I realised with a start that my old friend had never really bade me farewell, it was always there, always waiting for me, preying on my vulnerability and helplessness.
If only someone could understand.
11/29/2009 03:08:00 AM
Saturday, November 28, 2009
'Nuff Said
And please do not mention anything about exams or marketing =.=
11/28/2009 02:13:00 AM
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
~Oh, Poor Unfortunate Soul~
It took me a lot of days to think about writing this post, even pushed back my post about tabor's 19th as well as a ton of other more important stuff just to write this to you. Not that I'm expecting you to appreciate my words, but I guess these thoughts will only bother me more until I let it out. So, here's to you --
有些时候，我真的不了解你们这种人到底在想些什么。
你知道世上最烂的人是怎么样的人吗？不是杀人犯，不是强奸犯，不是爱说谎的人，而是只能通过贬低别人来抬高自己的那种人。
记得你跟我说过，你这个人不记仇，不拘小节，说得你好似十分潇洒。可我近来看到的种种都相差甚远呐！
当初和你争吵后，你拿他人的国籍来作话题大肆讽刺批评，如今你又找到别人新的攻击点了吗？你当真认为这种行为是对的吗？无论是什么样的情况都好，你觉得你践踏的是别人吗？抑或是你自己的人性呢？
像你这种人，自私，幼稚，虚伪，而且心胸狭窄得不得了。假装无私的人，却从来都只用自己的角度看待事情，不为他人着想。自称无所谓的人，却老是耿耿于怀，怀恨于心。感觉上好像很讨厌脏话的人，却在别人破口大骂时笑不拢嘴。这就是我现在所看到的你。
你说，很少与别人争吵，你知道为什么吗？不因为别的，因为你只喜欢和那些盲目地赞同你的看法的人混在一起。偶然出现了那些不满你种种缺陷的人，闹翻了之后，你只会用谎言来保护自己的立场，并用讽刺来让自己觉得占了优势。当然，其中少不了那些只会围在你身边为你说话的，那些你认为是你“朋友”的人。
让我来告诉你吧。没有人是完美的，可是对一些人来说，别人的缺陷是不可容忍的。真正为你好的人，真正为你好的“朋友”，肯定会当面告诉你你的缺点，在你错的时候斥责你或者劝你，而不是像哈巴狗似的讨好你为你说好话。
很多事情都与我无关，可是在我看到了你这一面之后，又要怎么样坦然和你交朋友呢？我可以在这里告诉你，我不是哈巴狗，如果觉得你错了，我会责骂你，因为我看不过去。虽然以你的性格来说，又会对我怀恨在心，甚至每天诅咒我，或者寻找新的攻击点，贬低我来抬高你自己。。。劝劝你，长大一点吧，这世界不需要更多像你一样心胸狭窄的人。你是人，我也是人，别人也是人，在做出这一切举动之时，你毁掉的不是别人的名誉，而是你自己的怜悯之心。同时，你捍卫的不是你自己所谓的清白或清高，事实是你正在告诉全世界的人自己有多肤浅，有多爱记仇，有多幼稚，有多自私。
我不想针对别的事情说谁对谁错，我只知道你的这种思想绝对是扭曲的。好好想想吧，再也不见了。
11/10/2009 11:43:00 PM
Monday, October 19, 2009
It's A Love Story
Romeo, save me, they try to tell me how to feel
This love is difficult, but it's real
Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess
It's a love story
Baby just say yes
~Love Story, Taylor Swift~
Those people whom I dedicate this to, you'll know who you are once you set your eyes on the above lyrics. Before I know it, the happiness of you two have already become so important to me. And hence, whatever it is, my simplest and deepest wish is for you both to be happy.
Yet, I know that at the end of the day, I'm still the odd one out. To put it crudely, what happens between the both of you is none of my business. It's your love story, and I'm just some passer-by. I complain about constantly being dumped at one corner, being ignored, and now, reflecting on my past actions, the only thing I can say about myself now is... I've been little more than a pest.
So, I shall stop my prying and let you two continue writing your story without any more hindrances. I will wait until you all feel like talking to me. Don't ever forget that if any one of you need anyone to speak to, rant to, cry to, I'm always here. Love you both.
10/19/2009 08:01:00 PM
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Overdue post for 23rd Sept
On the 23rd of September every year, I always find it hard to balance my time to celebrate the birthdays of both one of my besties as well as my sister.
But for the very first time in years, I got to celebrate with both Wen Han and my sis! ^ - ^
Here's what I did for Wen Han's birthday -- I've pretty much given her lots of different kinds of things for her birthday, so this year I've decided to give her handmade gifts! ^^
The twine was so thick it was near impossible to get those beads in, and one of the pretty beads cracked >_>
The finished product! =3
#2 was this!! OMG I LOVE IT!!! > w < !! This was a doll I sewn :D Lots of ugly stitches all over since sewing is really not my forte, but I'm glad it turned out rather well.
Met Wen Han for K-Lunch: Her birthday theme was about doing things with people that she never had the chance to, and thus we went for a 2-person Mayday karaoke session.
And this year both her mum and her aunt gave her bracelets as well, so we used the wish bracelet as a wish anklet instead =x
Ahahahaha she loved the doll! I told her it was meant to be a monkey but I thought it looked more like a cow. Then she looked and it and said it looked like a crossbreed between a monkey and a zebra. =_=''' In the end she decided it looked like a thief. LOL! So she named it 小贼. I love you 小贼!! XD
After that I met my sister and we shopped around and slacked around for a bit. Bought this musical box thingy for her (which I also happen to like a lot since my secondary school days). As you turn the handle you get to listen to the tune of "Beauty and the Beast". =3
For dinner we were headed to Kuishin Bo. Dang, we ate so much that I really thought I would end up puking. No more buffets for the rest of the year, please. >.<'''
Only the eclairs, cheesecake, and ice cream was good... The rest were horrible. >_>'''
Glutton caught red-handed!
And my very first go at chocolate fondue. Thanks arh, I know I very sua gu. =_=
Oh and we also got these from the capsule machines at Suntec. Whee I love these! XD In total we "turned" like, 5 of these in total. Ouch. X__X
And THIS present for my sis cost a bomb! Isn't it so pretty? XD
Back at home - another birthday cake =_=''' We were so full I only had ONE bite and I felt like dying already. =0='''
That was it for 23/09/2009! May every year be as joyful as this! (But I really hope that I would never spend this much money for any birthdays ever again! >.<)
9/26/2009 11:46:00 PM
Sunday, September 20, 2009
你们的快乐就是我的快乐
Nothing makes me happier than knowing my loved ones are happy. So, the best gift you guys can ever give me would be your happiness.
There is really no need to say your thanks because I know deep down that we are all grateful to have each other in our lives. And I will always be there for you guys when you need someone. ^__^
I was really touched while reading two particular blogs tonight. Ophira, Ban Ban, I love you both too. Moooooacks <333333
9/20/2009 02:25:00 AM
Thursday, September 17, 2009
short notice
hey all, i've changed my gmail add to tanshehui [at] gmail.com
please direct all future mail there. i'll be using this for gmail chat as well. in other words, i'm going to focus all my various email accounts into this new one because i'm really lazy to check my mail in multiple accounts each day =\
recess week is coming! i can't waitttttttttt..........
ok bye.
